it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Randomize
