Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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