Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
i dont even know how to be here
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
