dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
