Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
