i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Actions speak louder than pants.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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