if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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