Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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