the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I enjoy the company of your penis
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