I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
