i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
