Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
