MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
