69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
