Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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