I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
We are two peas in an std pod
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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