i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
You can't special order awesome
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
