Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Randomize
