so that wasnt chicken after all
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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