This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
