Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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