it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
