1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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