too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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