you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
