he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
