i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
do nipples grow back?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
