We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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