TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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