So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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