i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
