He is such a slut. More and more my type.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
