Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
he told me I talked like a deaf person
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
