She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
