i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
