And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Randomize
