I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
