Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Randomize
