Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
