that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
