The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
