Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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