you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
