OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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