ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
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