Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize