apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
