The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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