she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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