You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
